Daily Archives: 7 September 2012

Happy Friday Funnies 9/7/12

Considering the last couple of weeks, I had to bring it – convention style. Have a great weekend everyone! 🙂

“In her speech, First Lady Michelle Obama said her husband has dinner with his girls where they strategize about middle school relationships. Which explains why today the Pentagon ordered a drone strike on that lying bitch Ashley.” –Conan O’Brien

“The Republican Convention ended on Thursday. The Democratic Convention began last night. In between was a travel day for hookers.” –David Letterman

“I hope they go easy on Clint Eastwood. It wasn’t his best performance last week at the Republican convention, but he’s given us decades of great films. So Democrats, if you’re looking to mock Mitt Romney by dragging an inanimate object out onto the stage, why not just use Mitt Romney?” –Craig Ferguson

“First lady Michelle Obama is receiving praise for the speech she gave last night at the Democratic National Convention. Everyone was impressed. Even Fox News called it ‘not the worst.'” –Jimmy Fallon

“The first two nights of the Democratic convention are at the Time Warner Cable Arena and the big speech by President Obama will be at the Bank of America Stadium. That’s good thinking, the two things Americans love most: cable companies and banks.” –Jay Leno