GOP Debate: It’s What’s for Breakfast in Concord

After an evening of debating? I guess Meet the Press didn’t think we could live without another debate after 12 hours. It was a bit spicier, and Romney took some hits early on. I think they’re exhausted and cranky. Huntsman sounds like he’s coming down with something. Anyway, for those who didn’t bother, enjoy. 🙂

Newt Gingrich
1. “I know the red light doesn’t mean anything to you because you’re the front runner.” Thanks for laughing even though I’m serious. Seriously tired and bitter.
2. Environmental Solutions Agency. No, it is not like the EPA because they suck. Mine won’t be all about punishment. Gotta make business want to stop polluting.
3. Do you know what the Washington Post’s “Four Pinocchios” means? That Romney is a liar.

Jon Huntsman
1. Mittens pissed me off. You dogged on my service as ambassador. I will now use my stern tone.
2. There are no sacred cows. Medicare and Social Security? Be afraid Seniors. Be very afraid.
3. The American people are looking for a unifier. Crap. I should not have used anything Obama has used.

Ron Paul
1. Entitlements aren’t rights. We want to help the poor, but the real people who are getting the entitlements are banks and the military industrial complex.
2. As President, it’s going to be tough to change our foreign policy of 100 years. But if we don’t, it will be the death of America. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
3. I will continue to preach the gospel of Liberty. Libertarians are here. And we’re here to stay, baby!

Rick Perry
1. I’m going to mention the Tea Party as many times as I can. I have to get them to love me as much as Social Conservatives do.
2. The ones who will feel pain are the bureaucrats of the Departments of Commerce, Energy, and Education that we’ll do away with. Yay! I remembered all three this time.
3. Obama is a Socialist. Yeah, I said it. What are you going to do about it?

Mitt Romney
1. Natural gas! Yes, it’s alternative energy, but even a Conservative can support this one. Well, maybe not Perry.
2. In MA, I appointed gay judges and a member of my cabinet was gay. But ix-nay on the gay marriage-ay.
3. Dude! I can’t direct PAC ads. You know that. You’re just jealous that I’m getting their support.

Rick Santorum
1. If my son told me he was gay, I’d love him just as much as I did before he said that. Then, he’d be on the first plane to Marcus Bachmann’s reparative clinic.
2. Ron Paul is a loser who’s done nothing of importance and has no friends in Washington. I’ll need extra security on my way out today.
3. We can’t live with a nuclear Iran because they’re Mus-…uh, a theocracy


11 responses to “GOP Debate: It’s What’s for Breakfast in Concord

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: